With Father’s Day coming up this weekend, at Yogamatters we’ve been talking about father figures and how different these are for everyone.
Father’s day can be a tough time for many people and the day can sometimes serve as a heavy reminder of a person or relationship you are missing. So while it’s great to celebrate the incredible fathers out there on this day, we want to recognise that role models and childhood heroes aren’t always the person we call dad. We want to celebrate all of the men in our lives; the father figures and mentors that have helped shape us.
As June is also Pride month, it seemed fitting to share and celebrate two of my own personal role models, my dad and his husband.
Rainbow families and role models
I grew up in Denmark, which is overall a tolerant and openminded country and the first to recognise civil partnerships for same-sex couples in 1989. While things are still far from perfect there, it does mean that I’ve never truly been met with any real hate or prejudice for the way that my family looks. Sure, it leaves people a little stunned at first, but it is mostly just amusing to watch someone’s puzzled look when they realise my ‘stepdad’ is in fact married to my dad, and not to my mom. And that right there is where these two men become my role models. Because while I personally consider my life and my family completely ordinary, it is of course a little out of the norm and being extraordinary or different in any way, is not always easy.
My dad and his husband are my role models because they choose to live their authentic lives, they choose love even when it is not easy and they continue to choose each other. And I don’t mean that they have in any way chosen their sexuality, because who we all authentically are is of course not a choice we make. No, I mean, that in all relationships there are times where walking away is easier than staying. There are times where you have to fight to get it right. And these two have over the past 10 years shown me that if you have something worth fighting for, you do the work and you show up for each other.
Even though they live in Denmark and not somewhere where they could be prosecuted for the way that they live and the love that they share, I still cannot begin to imagine having to always be the ones whose life is different from what everyone perceives as “normal” and I’m sure they’ve had their fair share of trials. But they stand by each other and watching them love each other the way that they do, brings me so much joy.
In this way these two inspire me simply by living their extraordinarily ordinary lives.
Being an ally to LGTBQ+ people in your life
While my story and to a large extent my dad’s story, are a testament to progress and to the absolutely “regular lives” that are lived by LGBTQ+ people and couples all over the world, filled with grocery shopping, gardening and waking up next to the person you love each morning, it’s important to remember that we’ve still got far to go.
Pride is not all rainbows and parades, it’s a protest and a reminder that there are people still today being oppressed and shamed for simply being. I admire my dad(s) for something as simple as being with the person that they love, but in an ideal world it wouldn’t be admirable or extraordinary..
At Yogamatters’ we’ve supported the charity “Just like Us” since we launched our pride socks back in 2019 and they do some incredible work to support especially young people in the LGBTQ+ community, to empower and educate for equality.
Had the pleasure of joining our Pride tribe for our photoshoot back in 2019. Yogamatters is donating £2 for each pair of socks sold to LGBTQ+ charity ‘Just Like Us’.
This post is a testament to two of my role models, one of whom I happen to call dad. But this Father’s Day let us celebrate all of the foster fathers, fathers-to-be, father figures, childless fathers, step dads, dog dads and men that have simply inspired us.
